the mini

so the conversation and chaos started after i got back from minneapolis (the knitting convention is a whole other story. Remind me later to tell about it). Hubby bubby and i were at hacienda having dinner on 3/19. There was a cute little girl about 10 months old with her family - duh, with her family, not there on her own! Anyway. I told hubby bubby that "i want one of those." and he said, "you know what? So do i." what? so yeah. Wow. This is the guy who said he never wanted to get married, never wanted to have kids. He obviously changed in mind about getting married. Now he's changed his mind about having kids. This is huge.

so for two days that's all we talked about. All the different aspects of having kids. Money. Schools. Religion. Etc... It was crazy. And we talked about waiting until the end of the summer to start trying. Give us a little time to get used to it all. Get money in order. All of that good stuff. I called my obgyn to find out about getting off the pill, and what would happen with that. Was told that they suggest stopping the pill about three months before we want to get started on the trying part. Also said that it's possible to become pregnant before those three months are up. So that part was taken care of. Also checked out my agency's maternity leave policy. Always good to know. Looked in to short term disability benefits as well. By wednesday we were talked out. We said we either have to shit or get off the pot. We either have to start trying immediately, or quit talking about it. Told hubby bubby it was u p to him. He chose to start trying. Oh boy!

So we went to borders and bought pregnancy mags and a couple books, one of names. Hubby bubby bought a book for expectant fathers. So cute.

Then the trying and the waiting began. The trying part's fun. The waiting part, not so much. My body was going nuts, trying to figure it all out without the synthetic hormones. Did lots of ovulation tests. I'm learning more about hormones than i ever wanted to know. I mean, really, it was so easy for those girls in high school!!!! And my 19yo step-cousin is pregnant. Told hubby bubby maybe we should get drunk - that seemed to work for the hs and college girls. He didn't like that idea too much ☺

so this was all in the last 48 days. Been frantically following my cycle on a little on-line calendar. really thought that we were pregnant for a while. My boobs hurt sooooo bad. Never felt that before. And i was nauseous for about two weeks. So on day 36 when nothing was happening either way, i called the obgyn. Told me to wait another week, and if nothing was happening, to call again. So i called on day 46, and they had me come in for a blood test yesterday. Then wouldn't you know it, i start spotting today. Knew that would happen. Just got the call a little bit ago that the blood test was negative, and the dr wants to see me. So i'm going to go in next week.

this has been the absolute longest month of my life. Ever. Between march 2nd and today.... Wow. Really don't want to keep going through this, though i know i don't have much choice if we want to get pregnant and have littles.

the as of yet conceived child is alternatively referred to as "the mini" or "a little." i like calling it a "mini."

we already have names picked out. Isn't that silly. But we knew that would be the hardest part for us. I have modern names, hubby likes traditional. So we've settled on somewhere in between.

so i'm typing this up while at starbucks, waiting for a client who doesn't seem to want to show. I'll give her a few more minutes. This frustrates me. Not just the loss of units (billable time at work), but the waiting, and the inconsistency of this client. Oh well. Had my hot chocolate, got some work done.